I recently turned on some of that HBO sh-t and to my surprise, the Dragonball Z movie was about to air. Excited, I ended my game of Starcraft with my Korean buddies, gave the peace sign goodbye to my harajuku bitches, and prepared to meditate to the TV gods for this great opportunity of have a lot of hot female asian martial artists along with the baddest kung fu character, Goku, played by
Wait a sec. Hold up. Did I read that correctly? Justin Chadwin. Chadwin... is that name part of the Han Dynasty?
(Hours later)
So after further review of the family name Chadwin, turns out it is not asian according to these sacred scrolls. But dude!! You mean to tell me there wasn't ONE asian actor good enough to play the lead role AND have martial arts experience? For real for real?? And what's up with him on the poster with 3 chicks. OK, so I didn't watch the movie but I'm guessing he banged them. Seriously dude, white dudes ALWAYS bang the asian chicks in these films. I'm guessing he left one of them faster than a GI in a Saigon whorehouse. I'm guessing the chick on the left is the slutty one, the middle is the best friend chick who loves him but he doesn't love her and the one on the right is the chick he wants to dip his chopstick in but she's not sure if she should love him (but she does) and he hits that. Oh and let's not forget Chow Yun Fat as the unforgiving father (am I right? I'll probably watch the movie now cause I want to know if I'm close). And finally, how much do you want to bet that the main villain is the asian dude who also loves right side chick.
This is just messed up man. Thank god The Last Airbender won't go this route.
Sincerely,
Quiet Asian Man
